Saturday, March 13
SIGH! :(
i felt like a bitch today, and yesterday.
it was hard trying to be someone i'm not, and never gonna be i guess.
trying to act tough and not give in.
sigh. i'm sorry, i've wasted all of you all's effort. :(
but this time i think i'm in the wrong, i admit, and so i'm expected to apologise.
sorry.
to you, and all of you.
sigh.
To M:
i'm sorry, really sorry.
as much as i want your understanding, i know you wont be able to. cause if i were in your shoes, i guess it's gonna be hard.
sigh.
but seriously, i need it.
disappointed. what a harsh word. and i guess i'll never forget tt.
maybe apology wont work this out, but everything i said before tt day was true.
but listen, i seriously had no extra cash to spend on it(like what i've told you), and ytd's final decision was kinda last-minute.
can you imagine tt i'm already there and everyone had decided on it while i say "no".
and just walk off and go home the minute i reached there.
sigh, maybe you still wont understand despite me saying all this. but still, i hope you could think it through and understand my position ytd.
i felt so depress, like i've done so many wrong things like i've never did in merely TWO DAYS.
1)being a bitch(to m i know)
2)wasted everyone's effort(but i'm pretty sure this is enough)
3)being so rude and trying to act tough outside(by not talking and ignoring everything)
4)the movie.
5)doing all those wrong things.
and the last reason is, the word disappointed
yes, i understand why you're upset of course. i'm in the wrong.
maybe i shouldnt even say what i've said.
i read what you cancelled in the letter, i felt soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo BITCHY. x10000000000
SIGH.
idk what could help this situation, but i can only promise you tt there wont be another time like this.
and that this will be the last.
idk how to show you, but i really am apologetic.
and...
yes, you're still me closest friend, no matter what or why.
trust me and us.
knowing me, you should know i would "abandon" those "old friends" once i've had myself "new ones".
so believe in that. only then can we seemed not so "cold" like how you felt.
i'm sorry lovely. :'(
Labels: i suck today and ytd
